Songs for Kel
by Dolphingirl32173
Summary: A compilation of one-shot song-fics surrounding Kel. DISCONTINUED!
1. Just a Dream

Songs for Kel  
DG32173

Sarah: this is my third fic that will be filled with song-chapters. The first was for Naruto, the second for the Twilight Saga, and now this one completely for Kel from the Protector of the Small quartet by Tamora Pierce. The songs-chapters in this fic will all center around Kel and whoever I decide to pair her with or just Kel. I might make other fanfics like this for other characters in the Protector quartet. The M-rating for the fanfic is just to be safe for future chapters. Anyway, here's my usual pre-story stuff in a fic like this.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the wondrous world of Tortall or any of the characters that reside within the tales about it. Nor do I own the songs I use in this fic. I only own what I do with the above and this fanfic; don't steal.

RATING: T

CHAPTER SUMMARY: AU Today was to be my wedding day, not the day I mourn the loss of my soul mate… _Kel's POV __**(takes place in our world during the Vietnam War)**_

GENRE: romance/angst

PAIRINGS: Kel/Neal

SONG: Just a Dream

ARTIST: Carrie Underwood

* * *

JUST A DREAM

_**It was two weeks after the day she turned eighteen  
All dressed in white  
Going to the church that night  
She had his box of letters in the passenger seat  
Sixpence in a shoe, something borrowed, something blue**_

I swallow the sobs and tears that want to pour forth. Today was supposed to be my wedding day to Neal, my soul mate. I just turned eighteen two weeks ago while he is twenty-three … or he would be twenty-three if he were still alive.

I'm dressed in the beautiful white wedding gown I had picked out with my mother just prior to my birthday. There's a sixpence in my shoe, his box of letters are in the passenger seat, my necklace emerald heart necklace I borrowed from one of my older sisters, and my earrings are sapphire drops. I have all the requirements for a perfect wedding to lead into a perfect marriage except one: my groom.

_**And when the church doors opened up wide  
She put her veil down  
Trying to hide the tears  
Oh she just couldn't believe it  
She heard trumpets from the military band  
And the flowers fell out of her hand**_

As the doors leading onto the aisle to the altar where I should be getting married swing open, I put my veil down, trying to hide my tears behind it. I can't believe that he's gone so quickly. And I can't even give him a proper funeral. The land mine that he had stepped on in Vietnam had blown him into too many pieces to gather even for a cremation. When I reach the altar, I hear the trumpets from the military band and I lose what little control I have over my emotions. The red rose bouquet I had been clenching fall from my hands as I raise them to sob into them.

_**Baby why'd you leave me  
Why'd you have to go?  
I was counting on forever, now I'll never know  
I can't even breathe  
It's like I'm looking from a distance  
Standing in the background  
Everybody's saying, he's not coming home now  
This can't be happening to me  
This is just a dream**_

Why did you leave me, Neal? Why did you have to go? I was counting on forever to spend with you … now I'll never know what it would have been like. My breath catches in my throat as I try to keep the sobs that wrack my body silent.

It's like watching everything from a distance with, standing in the background as everyone says that he's not coming home now. This can't be happening to me, it's just a dream. But even as I think that, I know the cold, hard truth is that he is really gone.

_**The preacher man said let us bow our heads and pray  
Lord please lift his soul, and heal this hurt  
Then the congregation all stood up and sang the saddest song that she ever heard  
Then they handed her a folded up flag  
And she held on to all she had left of him  
Oh, and what could have been  
And then the guns rang one last shot  
And it felt like a bullet in her heart**_

The preacher asks everyone to bow their heads and pray for the fallen man. My head is already bowed from immense sorrow and excruciating pain where my heart had been. I hear the preacher's prayer, "Lord please lift his soul and heal this hurt."

What is the man thinking? Nothing can heal this pain. My heart had been torn out and shredded the very moment I heard the news of his death. The congregation stands up and sings the saddest song I have ever heard. Then a corporal hands me a folded up flag and I cling to the bit of cloth that is all I have left of my Neal and what could have been had he lived.

Then guns ring out in one last shot. I don't know when we had all moved outside for the military's part in the funeral. The sound is like a bullet to the fragments of my heart.

_**Baby why'd you leave me  
Why'd you have to go?  
I was counting on forever, now I'll never know  
I can't even breathe  
It's like I'm looking from a distance  
Standing in the background  
Everybody's saying, he's not coming home now  
This can't be happening to me  
This is just a dream**_

As everyone starts to leave, the clouds that had been threatening rain all day let loose. As the congregation, preacher, and military people pass me, they apologize for my loss and several offer some of what little memorabilia they have of left of Neal. I give soft "thank you"s as I accept the little gifts and nods to the others.

_**Oh,  
Baby why'd you leave me  
Why'd you have to go?  
I was counting on forever, now I'll never know  
Oh, now I'll never know  
It's like I'm looking from a distance  
Standing in the background  
Everybody's saying, he's not coming home now  
This can't be happening to me  
This is just a dream**_

Third person point of view

As the days turn into weeks then months, Kel keeps hoping and praying that she'll wake up from this nightmare. She grows more and more isolated as time passes by. No one can stand to see the beautiful girl become so lifeless without her best friend, her love, her Neal. What they don't know is that every night she dreams of the man who had been her world, of the wall that separates the living and dead.

_**Oh, this is just a dream  
Just a dream  
Yeah, Yeah**_

Finally, on the first anniversary of Neal's death, Kel takes her own life by overdosing on sleeping pills. She is found sprawled across her floor, a soft smile decorating her lips at last. If those who found her didn't know better, they would have thought she was just asleep. But she was cold and stiff to the touch without a pulse or a breath in her body. She was clutching the flag she had received upon his make-shift funeral …


	2. What Hurts The Most

Songs for Kel  
DG32173

Sarah: here's another sad song-chapter.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the world or realm of Tortall; I don't own the characters from said realm and world; I also don't own the songs I use. I do own this fanfic and song-chapters, don't steal or I will cry.

RATING: T

CHAPTER SUMMARY: a pregnant Kel thinks of the death of her best friend, and sometimes lover, Neal. She hadn't realized that she had loved him so much until he was gone from her life, shattering the perfection of it…

GENRE: romance/angst

PAIRINGS: Kel/Neal

SONG: What Hurts The Most

ARTIST: Cascada _or_ Rascal Flatts (take your pick. I use Cascada's lyrics)

_**Lyrics**_

* * *

WHAT HURTS THE MOST

_**I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house**_

_**That don't bother me  
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out**_

Kel stares lifelessly out her bedroom window in the Queenscove castle, where she has been staying for eight and a half months now. It's raining outside again. It has been raining continuously for a month now. It's been raining since his death.

_**I'm not afraid to cry  
every once in a while even though going on**_

_**with you gone still upsets me**_

Kel shakes her head sadly as tears stream from her eyes as she remembers her best friend and lover, Nealan of Queenscove, known as Neal to his friends and family; he had also earned the nickname Meathead for his stubbornness and refusal to back down against anyone that was not Kel, the king, or his father. He had been her only lover, and thus the father of the child she carries within her womb.

She absentmindedly rubs her bulging stomach under the dress she is wearing. She is dressed entirely in the mourning black, as all of his friends and family have been for the past month. Queenscove and Neal's friends have been mourning the loss of Queenscove's heir, a priceless treasure of a man.

_**There are days  
every now and again I pretend I'm OK**_

_**But that's not what gets me**_

Kel has been staying in Queenscove since just after she and Neal had realized she was pregnant with his child. She thinks back on her last words to him when he was heading back to this new war with Scanra and falls to her knees, sobbing her regret and guilt into her hands. Those words had been angry ones.

_**What hurts the most, was being so close  
and having so much to say  
And watching you walk away**_

She hadn't wanted him to risk his life when she couldn't watch his back as she has always done. She had known a royal order cannot be disobeyed without being hung on traitor's hill or banishment from the realm.

But she had been angry and hadn't been thinking about that. They had gotten into their worst fight ever that ended in him racing Magewhisper, his horse ever since their first day as pages, away from her. He hadn't looked back. After he had gone off to war, she had cried herself to sleep in their bed that night.

_**Never knowing, what could have been  
And not seeing that loving you  
is what I was trying to do**_

She had only learned that he had wanted to propose to her when he got home from the war after his body was brought back to Queenscove for burial. There had been a note and an intricately beautiful ring in his pocket when his body had been recovered from the grounds where a skirmish that had killed all involved, Tortallan and Scanran, had taken place.

The ring was tied to the note with a red ribbon and the note addressed to her. The note had said that if he fell in war, he wanted her to know he regretted leaving with such animosity between them and that he had planned to propose to her when he got back from the war.

Until the moment she had seen that engagement ring, she hadn't realized that she loved Neal as much as he loved her. They had become lovers, for her at least, because they found each other sexually attractive. She hadn't realized that what she thought was lust for his body was actually love of the man she was with.

_**It's hard to deal with the pain  
of losing you everywhere I go  
but I'm doing it**_

Everywhere Kel looks these days, she sees his grin, his eyes softened with his love for her. She hears his laughter and his voice murmuring "I love you" in the wind. There is nowhere she can go to escape memories of him. And she doesn't want to find a place either. She deserves the excruciating pain of lost love day in and day out for those last, angry words to him.

_**It's hard to force that smile when  
I see our old friends and I'm alone  
Still harder getting up, getting dressed,  
living with this regret**_

She has had to force a smile for their friends when she sees them, though she knows she's not fooling them. She has always had trouble forcing an emotion onto her face that she doesn't really feel. She doubts she will ever get the hang of it.

At any rate, she rarely sees anyone these days. They have come to leave her alone while she stays in the rooms she had shared with Neal except for at mealtimes. She can only force herself out of bed and getting dressed in the morning because she is an expectant mother. She forces herself to eat food that has come to taste disgusting for the developing child's sake.

But she otherwise lives with regret and guilt over losing him without ever telling him how she really feels. She feels that if she had not angered him so much before he left, he would have taken more care and have come back to her and their child. Her mind knows that, even if she had not angered him so much, he might still have died in this war. At least he had not become a Stormwing's toy. That would have made her life unbearable.

_**But I know if I could do it over  
I would trade, give away all the words that  
I saved in my heart that I left unspoken**_

If she could do that last hour of their time together again, she would tell him everything she had left unsaid: how much she loves him in return, that they could have a great family when he got home from the war, how much it would hurt her if he got himself killed. But she can't, and guilt and regret burns savagely in the holes in her heart and her soul left by his death.

_**What hurts the most, was being so close  
And having so much to say  
And watching you walk away  
Never knowing, what could have been  
And not seeing that loving you  
Is what I was trying to do**_

She had not seen that loving Neal is what she had been trying to do from day one, the day he had saved her from haven Joren of Stone Mountain as her sponsor during her probationary year as a page. She had not seen that she had loved him all these years. Only when he was gone from her life did she know how much of her will to live surrounded his existence.

_**I'm not afraid to cry  
every once in a while even though  
Going on with you gone still upsets me  
there are days  
Every now and again I pretend I'm OK**_

_**But that's not what gets me**_

She gasps when a convulsion rips through her body. What is going on? Another convulsion soon follows the first, followed by more. That's when she realizes what the convulsions are: contractions! She's in labor! But her due date is still two weeks away!

_**What hurts the most, was being so close  
And having so much to say  
And watching you walk away  
Never knowing, what could have been  
And not seeing that loving you  
Is what I was trying to do**_

She struggles to her feet and stumbles over to a rope hanging by the bed. She jerks on the rope three times. The rope is attached to a bell in the healers' mess. If a healer is in there, and there should be several since it is at the end of supper, they will come running.

Minutes later, a healer bursts into her room. "What is it?" she asks in a rush.

"Labor," Kel manages to gasp out, clutching her stomach as the painful contractions become more and more frequent.

At those words, everything happens so fast that Kel thinks time must have sped up around her. She's rushed to a birthing room in the hall where the healer's work and live, more healers joining her and the healer who had come to her rooms when they arrive.

_**What hurts the most, was being so close  
And having so much to say  
And watching you walk away  
Never knowing, what could have been  
And not seeing that loving you  
Is what I was trying to do**_

Several hours later, Kel, on the doorstep to the Dark God's realm, weakly holds her newborn son. She has just enough life left in her to look into eyes as green as his father's with hazel flecks from her own eyes. He had been cleaned of blood from the delivery and Kel can see that his hair came straight from his father, red as flames. When asked what she wanted to name her son, Kel uses her last breaths to gasp out: "Nealan of Queenscove, after his father." After that, her eyes flutter closed, and she breathes her very last breath before the Dark God takes her soul to his realm…


	3. Mary's Song Oh My My My

Songs for Kel

DG32173

Sarah: Well, the first two chapters were pretty sad, so I decided to go for sappy this time around. And I don't really like changing the age difference of characters of books I write about much; I decided to use Cleon instead of Neal. Neal/Kel is my most favorite of all Kel pairings, but the age difference is too vast for the song. Besides, Neal will be the most common guy paired with Kel in this fanfic anyways, so I should add others into it when i can.

DISCLAIMER: I only own what I make up for the song-chapters around the lyrics and this fanfic; don't steal or I'll send a Siberian tiger after you.

RATING: T (just in case)

CHAPTER SUMMARY: AU Kel and Cleon remember the past eighty years they have shared their lives with each other…

GENRE: romance

PAIRINGS: Kel/Cleon

SONG: Mary's Song (Oh My, My, My)

ARTIST: Taylor Swift

_**KEY  
**__**Lyrics**__  
Memories_

* * *

MARY'S SONG (OH MY MY MY)

Kel moves her hand to hold Cleon's as he sits beside her on their front porch, watching their family enjoy the first snow of the year. "Remember how we met, Cleon? I was seven and you were nine," she asks in an age-roughened voice. It is obvious that the elderly woman had been a beauty when she was younger, but age has given her eyes a glint of much wisdom and added wrinkles to her skin.

Next to her, Cleon chuckles, squeezing her hand. "Of course," he says, grinning. "Eighty years hasn't dimmed one moment of my time with you."

_**She said, I was seven and you were nine  
I looked at you like the stars that shined  
In the sky, the pretty lights**_

"_Kel, I want you to meet someone," the seven year old heard her father call from the porch._

"_Coming, Daddy!" she yelled, running through the house while dodging her young nieces and nephews with the ease of much practice. She burst out the screen door to see her parents standing with three other people, two adults and a boy a few years older than her._

_Kel moved to stand by her mother, watching the boy with fascination. She had only ever met one other boy who wasn't related to her, and Neal was five years older than her. This boy was _very_ handsome; his dark eyes sparkling like the stars that shined in the night sky._

"_Kel, this is Mr. and Mrs. Kennan, and their son, Cleon. They're new to the neighborhood. They moved into the house next to Neal's. This is our daughter Keladry," her mother said, introducing them._

"_Call me Kel," she piped up automatically when her mother used her full name, which she really hated. She extended a hand toward the boy. "Nice to meet you," she said, smiling shyly._

_**And our daddies used to joke about the two of us  
Growing up and falling in love and our mamas smiled  
And rolled their eyes and said oh my my my**_

_After being forced to spend time together while their parents visited with each other almost daily, Kel and Cleon began to hear their fathers joke about the two of them growing up and falling in love. Kel didn't understand what they meant, as she had only known the love of friends and of family. She liked Cleon well enough, but he didn't like her to begin with. They didn't see their mothers roll their eyes, but did hear them say "oh my my my" at each joke._

_**Take me back to the house in the backyard tree  
Said you'd beat me up, you were bigger than me  
You never did, you never did**_

_When they were in the tree house her dad had built for the kids to play in, Kel asked Cleon, "What did daddy mean by us falling in love when we grow up?"_

_He glared at her. "I'll beat you up if you ever mention than that again!" he said angrily. He was bigger than her. But he never followed through with his threat._

_**Take me back when our world was one block wide  
I dared you to kiss me and ran when you tried  
Just two kids, you and I...  
Oh my my my my**_

_The world to Kel and Cleon had been just one block wide, not counting the bus ride to and from school. Kel had found out very quickly that Cleon never refused a dare, no matter what the dare was about. So she decided to break that record of his one afternoon the summer after the one they had first met in. 'I dare you to kiss me," she announced to Cleon while they were lazing about in her backyard._

"_You're joking," he said, glaring at her. It had been several months since he had last glared at her._

"_Nope," she said, thinking to herself 'his streak of accepting dares is _over!'_ To her shock, he actually tried to kiss her. She ran, thinking that she would _never_ do that again. He _would_ accept a dare to do _anything,_ no matter how embarrassing it is. She didn't see him smirk at her back as she ran away. He had known that she wouldn't let him follow through with that particular dare, which is the only reason he had tried to._

_**Well, I was sixteen when suddenly  
I wasn't that little girl you used to see  
But your eyes still shined like pretty lights**_

_It took until seeing Kel in a bikini at her sixteenth birthday party, which was held on the beach, for Cleon to realize that she wasn't the little girl that he had befriended almost nine years before. He realized it when he saw Neal flirting with Kel jokingly, like the older man always did. He had never gotten any reaction before that day at seeing Neal do that. But that day he got angry and filled with an emotion he could only describe as jealousy._

_Then Kel's eyes met his and light up with a warmth he had grown used to seeing, but had never before realized that the warmth appeared only when she was looking at him. Then she slapped Neal on the head. "Quit it, silly," she scolded their twenty-one year old friend. "You're going to embarrass yourself, and Yuki's watching."_

_Yuki and Neal had been dating for several years now and Yuki was used to Neal flirting with Kel. Kel was the only one that was oblivious to the fact that Neal chose to be with Yuki because Kel wasn't of legal age for him to be with her yet. Cleon had known that fact for years, but had never been angry at Neal's reason for dating Yuki as he was now._

_Cleon would never know where he got the guts to pull off his next action, but he walked over and stole Kel's first kiss in front of everyone at the party. He could _feel_ Neal's lethal glare on him, but couldn't care less. If looks could kill, Cleon would have been a pile of ashes in that instant; but he would have be a very smug pile of ashes. Neal had wanted to be the one to take Kel's first kiss, and everyone but Kel knew it._

_When he pulled back, Cleon smiled at Kel. "Happy sixteenth birthday, Kel," he said, voice slightly husky from the strange sensations running through his body. He felt extremely pleased to be the cause of the scarlet blush on her cheeks and her stuttered "thank you"._

_**And our daddies used to joke about the two of us  
They never believed we'd really fall in love  
And our mamas smiled and rolled their eyes  
And said oh my my my...**_

_The day after their first kiss was the day they started dating seriously. Neal was on a warpath for months until he finally accepted that Kel had made her choice and that he loved her more than enough to want her to be happy, even if he wasn't the one who put that special smile on her face, the radiant smile that only Cleon could summon forth._

_Neither Kel's nor Cleon's father had ever been serious about their jokes of their kids growing up and falling in love; they had never believed the two would really fall in love. Their mothers just smiled and rolled their eyes, saying "oh my my my"._

_Eventually, Neal gave up on all hopes of winning Kel from Cleon and focused seriously on Yuki. He loved the girl, but not as much as he loved Kel._

_**Take me back to the creek beds we turned up  
Two A.M. riding in your truck and all I need is you next to me**_

_Kel and Cleon often went off-roading at all at all hours of the day and night in his truck. They turned up plenty of creek beds in two a.m. rides, only needing to be next to each other and filling with joy in their moments together._

_**Take me back to the time we had our very first fight  
The slamming of doors instead of kissing goodnight  
You stayed outside till the morning light  
Oh my my my my**_

_Like with all couples, Kel and Cleon experienced their very first, but definitely not their only, fight. Kel, infuriated with him, slammed the truck door as she got out and slammed her front door in Cleon's face when he tried to follow her inside, all apologies._

_He stayed outside all night, despite the cold of late autumn, until the sun peaked over the horizon. That's when Kel decided that she loved him too much to stay mad any longer. She went outside and kissed him, letting him know she forgave him._

_**A few years had gone and come around  
We were sitting at our favorite spot in town  
And you looked at me, got down on one knee**_

_Several years later, when she was twenty-one and he was twenty-three, they were sitting on a bench under a cherry tree in the park, their favorite spot in the whole town. He looked at her, sitting on his left, reaching into his right pocket. She turned toward him, curious as to what he was doing. Then he got down on one knee, causing her to gasp in surprise. He produced a beautiful, yet simple, diamond engagement ring. "Keladry Mindelan, will you marry me?" he asked huskily._

_Her eyes filled with tears as she let him slip the ring on her left ring finger. "I will," she said softly._

_**Take me back to the time when we walked down the aisle  
Our whole town came and our mamas cried  
You said I do and I did too**_

_It was only a few months later that she walked down the aisle in a gorgeous wedding dress to meet him, in a tux for the first time in his life, before the altar. The whole town had come to their wedding, their mothers crying in the front seats. Neal was there along with Yuki, who was his wife of three years by then, and their two-year-old son, Yuan. By that time, Neal was happy that he had married Yuki, as he knew he would never have made as good a husband to Kel as Cleon would._

_**Take me home where we met so many years before  
We'll rock our babies on that very front porch  
After all this time, you and I**_

_They moved into Kel's old home, as Kel's family had grown too large to live there two years before and had moved to a larger house a few blocks away. They talked of how they would rock their babies on the very front porch they had met on and how they would be together forever._

_**I'll be eighty-seven; you'll be eighty-nine  
I'll still look at you like the stars that shine  
In the sky, oh my my my...**_

Kel smiles when their only great-grandchild, a two-year-old girl who inherited her great-grandfather's hair, comes scrambling up the stairs, followed by the rest of their family. They still lived in the same house they had moved into as newlyweds sixty-six years before; they had merely expanded and built onto it as their family grew.

She will be eighty-seven soon and Cleon will be eighty-nine soon after. She still looks at Cleon like he were the stars that shine in the night sky, as she had eighty long years ago when they first met …


	4. Words By Heart

Songs for Kel

DG32173

Sarah: I just noticed. I have been talking in each and every chapter of this fanfic when usually I don't. Well, I hope ya'll enjoy this chapter. Please review when your done. This will be one of the _very_ few times I change the age difference between two characters from a book. Neal and Kel will be the same age in this chapter.

DISCLAIMER: I only own the song-chapters around the lyrics and this fanfic. Don't steal or I'll send a Chihuahua that never stops yipping after you.

RATING: T for mentions of sex and cursing

CHAPTER SUMMARY: AU Neal finds Kel's goodbye letter in his letterman jacket ten years after she left him. He remembers their time together and the words in the letter …

GENRE: drama

PAIRINGS: Neal/Kel

SONG: Words By Heart

ARTIST: Billy Ray Cyrus

_**KEY**_  
_**Lyrics**_

* * *

WORDS BY HEART

_**I went through the closet back in my old home  
Found a letterman's jacket so I slipped it on  
Deep in the pocket still folded up tight  
Was the letter you wrote to tell me goodbye**_

Neal goes through his closet, organizing everything. It's been some time since he had cleaned the closet out. In the back of his closet, he finds a letterman jacket from when he played football for his high school ten years ago.

He slips it on, just to see if it still fits. Surprisingly, it does. Putting his hands deep in the pockets, his right hand finds a piece of paper folded up tight. It's the letter Kel had written to tell him goodbye all those years ago.

_**The minute I saw it I just had to smile  
It smelled like old leather as smooth as a child  
I took a deep breath then put it away  
There was no need to read it I knew just what it would say**_

The minute he sees it, he just has to smile. The smell wafting from it is like old leather, the paper as smooth as a child. He took a deep breath, then puts the letter away. He has no need to read it, he knows exactly what it says.

_**I know the words by heart, I know every line  
From this ain't easy to you'll get along just fine  
I know every comma, every question mark  
No I don't have to look I know the words by heart**_

He knows the word by heart, every line from _this ain't easy_ to _you'll get along just fine._ He knows every comma, every question mark. He doesn't have to look. His heart still remembers every word.

_**Scenes like home movies flash through my head  
The homecoming game, that night on my bed**_

The scenes from their final night together flash through his head. It was the night of the homecoming game. Kel had been head cheerleader while he had been the star quarterback. Looking at him now, no one would believe he played football when he was younger. They had been together all four years of high school and the last two years of middle school. The night after he helped win their senior year homecoming game, they had spent the night making love on his bed until early morning, when they had grown too tired to continue.

_**The words that you wrote still cut me in two  
How you said you still cared but that we were through**_

The words she had written still cut him in two, how she said she still cared but that they were through. He had been planning on spending forever together. He even bought a ring to propose to her with the next day, the day she had left him with just a letter of goodbye. He still has that ring.

He snorts at one line from the letter. She said he'd get along just fine. Like hell he has. No other woman was able to become even a close friend after losing his love and best friend. Not they hadn't tried. He just couldn't stand the pain of losing another best friend like he had lost his Kel.

He hasn't gotten along fine in the least. Twenty-eight now, he's still a bachelor when all his men friends are married and happy with growing families. Everyone tells him to move on, but how can you move on after losing your soul mate?

_**I know the words by heart, I know every line  
From this ain't easy to you'll get along just fine  
I know every comma, every question mark  
No I don't have to look I know the words by heart**_

Every word still hits his heart like a battering ram, but he knows them all by heart.

_**Ain't it funny how a memory can play tricks on your mind  
I don't remember a thing from my classes  
but I can quote you every line**_

Funny how a memory can play tricks on one's mind. He doesn't remember anything from his classes, but he can quote Kel every line. They had been best friends from kindergarten, and fell in love in seventh grade. Now, he still loves her with all his heart and soul, but he doesn't know how she feels. He doesn't even know where she is or if she's married. If she _is_ married, whoever is her husband is one damned lucky bastard.

_**I took off my jacket and put it away  
With your note in the pocket like I found it that day  
Poured me a beer then pictured your face  
And drank a silent toast to things that time can't erase**_

He takes off his jacket and puts it away in the back of his closet, her note in the pocket like how he had found it the day she had left him. Then he heads to the kitchen. Once there, he pours himself a beer, pictures her face – the same face that stars in his dreams every night – and drinks a silent toast to the things that time can't erase.

_**I know the words by heart, I know every line  
From this ain't easy to you'll get along just fine  
I know every comma, every question mark  
No I don't have to look I know the words by heart**_

_**I know the words by heart, I know every line  
From this ain't easy to you'll get along just fine  
I know every comma, every question mark  
No I don't have to look I know the words by heart**_

Yeah, he knows the words of that letter by heart. He had read it several times a day for two years after finding it, until he had it so well memorized that he would never forget those words no matter how many years pass.

_**I know the words**_


	5. Bethlehem in Birmingham

Songs for Kel

DG32173

Sarah: Merry Christmas everyone! Here's a little song-chapter to celebrate the holiday season, just like I did last year in the Naruto song-fic _Songs About Me._ Hope you all have a great holiday season! Also, i had originally planned to do two or three Christmas chapters this year, but i didn't have time because i've been so busy. I hope you all like this chapter.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the song and I don't own Kel or Neal.

RATING: T _**just in case**_

CHAPTER SUMMARY: AU Kel is in labor with Neal's Christmas Eve and their car breaks down behind the barn.

GENRE: Romance/Drama

PAIRINGS: Kel/Neal

SONG: Bethlehem in Birmingham

ARTIST: Toby Keith

_**KEY**_  
_**Lyrics**_

* * *

BETHLEHEM IN BIRMINGHAM

_**Christmas Eve in Birmingham  
It's a long, long way from Bethlehem  
Mary and Joe live outside of town  
On an old, run-down farm**_

On an old farm several miles outside of Birmingham, live Kel and Neal Queenscove, a young couple who just got married nearly a year ago. Tomorrow, Christmas Day, will be their first anniversary as well as the day their first-born child, a daughter, is to be born. It's far from Bethlehem, but they will need a Bethlehem Miracle tonight, though they don't know it yet.

_**Mary says, Joe, you'd better get the car  
My contractions ain't that far apart**_

Kel's contractions start in the early evening, but the doctors had told them to wait until the contractions start getting closer than seven minutes apart before coming to town. Finally, late in the evening, the time comes for them to get in his old Falcon and head to town.

_**But that Falcon stalled after sixty yards  
Out behind the barn**_

But the Falcon stalls after about sixty yards, behind their old barn. When Neal tries for five full minutes and the car refuses to start, they hurry into the stables.

_**So away to the stables go Mary and Joe  
Now, it's not much shelter, but it keeps them from the cold**_

Now, the stables aren't much of a shelter, but it keeps the cold away. And that's important for the safety of the baby. A newborn's body has very, _very_ little fat in it, not nearly enough to keep the child warm in the middle of even a southern winter.

_**Mary's hurtin', Joe prays to God for a helping hand  
They need a Bethlehem miracle tonight in Birmingham**_

Kel screams out in pain as she pushes, trying to bring her daughter into the world. Neal prays to God, asking for a helping hand and a Bethlehem miracle. There is little he can do but support his wife and hold her hand.

_**A kerosene lantern is the only light  
Joe says, Mary, don't give up the fight  
She's gonna keep pushin' till the baby cries  
If it takes her last breath**_

A kerosene lantern is the only light in the barn. "Don't give up the fight, Kel," Neal whispers, stroking her arm

Weak from effort, she gives him a small smile. "I'll keep pushing till she cries, no matter what," she gasps between pushes.

_**Then as the dawn begins to break  
Across the fields, valleys and the lakes  
A baby's cry greets the light of day  
Merry Christmas and God bless**_

It takes all night, but, as dawn begins to break, a baby's cry greets the light of day throughout the valley their farm is in, across the fields, forests, and lakes. "Merry Christmas," Neal murmurs in Kel's ear. "God bless. What will we name her?"

_**Now away in the stables lay Mary, the baby, and Joe  
It's not much shelter, but it keeps them from the cold  
Mary's cradles her baby, Joe thanks God for the helping hand  
There was a Bethlehem miracle last night in Birmingham**_

Kel takes her daughter after Neal finishes cleaning the infant of blood with a clean saddle blanket. She looks down into the baby's emerald eyes, the same eyes of her husband. "Miracle," she whispers. "Let's call her Miracle. She is one."

_**A Bethlehem miracle last night in Birmingham**_


	6. Just One Little Kiss

Songs for Kel

DG32173

Sarah: I hope you enjoy this chapter! And _please_ review if you like it! I haven't got a single review on any chapter in this song-fic and it's discouraging me from continuing. If I get no reviews for this chapter, I will discontinue this fanfic until I got at least one review for this chapter. I will continue writing song-chapters for myself, but I won't post them.

DISCLAIMER: I only own my ideas and this story. Everything else belongs to other people.

RATING: K+

CHAPTER SUMMARY: Neal surprises Kel with a kiss. Kel is completely surprised by her own reaction.

GENRE: romance

PAIRINGS: Kel/Neal

SONG: Just One Little Kiss

ARTIST: Lila McCann

_**KEY**_  
_**Lyrics**_

* * *

JUST ONE LITTLE KISS

_**I thought you were just a friend  
Someone I could talk to when I needed a shoulder  
Seemed like just another night  
Somehow you just happened by**_

I had always thought of him as just my best friend, someone I could talk to when I needed a shoulder or confide in. It seemed like just another night that he somehow 'just happened by' my rooms in the palace wing that houses the King's Own, even though we both knew that his rooms were quite a distance from mine.

_**But you knew better  
I found out when we kissed**_

But he knew better. I found that out when he kissed me. It wasn't the usual kiss on the forehead or cheek that he gave me to say goodnight. He really _kissed_ me, tongue and everything.

_**And oh, just one little kiss  
And now I know what I missed  
Baby all my life and I was not expecting this  
Now you got me where I live  
With just one little kiss**_

Just one kiss and I knew exactly what I missed. All those little words and phrases he let slip and the strange, smoldering stares when he thought I wasn't watching throughout the years finally added up in a way that made sense. Ten years I had known him and I never expected this. He got straight to my heart with that one little kiss. That day he had constantly opened his mouth to say something to me, but the words that came out didn't seem what he had originally intended to say. I never guessed that he was trying to tell me he loved me.

_**They say things we leave unsaid  
They just turn into regrets  
When nights get long and lonely**_

They say things left unsaid turn into regrets when nights get long and lonely. I was constantly filled with regret on such nights, but I couldn't figure out what it was I regretted until the moment he kissed me.

_**Somehow baby you got through  
I've been waiting for you too  
I didn't know, I found out when we kissed**_

That was when I realized that I had been waiting for his love. I didn't know until we kissed. I hadn't realized that I loved him.

_**And oh, just one little kiss  
And now I know what I missed  
Baby all my life and I was not expecting this  
Now you got me where I live  
With just one little kiss**_

One kiss turned my world around. One kiss caused my life to suddenly make perfect sense. One kiss and I realized my reason for being born.

_**You think that love forsakes you  
Then by surprise it takes a hold**_

I thought I had been forsaken by love. My relationships with Cleon and Dom never worked out. Then, by complete surprise, love found and took hold of me.

_**And oh, just one little kiss  
And now I know what I missed  
Baby all my life and I was not expecting this  
Now you got me where I live**_

These thoughts run through my head as I go through this day in seemingly slow motion. I wait impatiently for the words to be spoken. The words that will change my life forever, making my world perfect.

_**With just one little kiss**_

"You may now kiss the bride."

And he kisses me as passionately as he had that day exactly one year ago, the day that made me realize what my heart wanted most. I am no longer Keladry of Mindelan. I am now Keladry of Queenscove, and I will spend the rest of my life with my Neal.


End file.
